An 'article' in the Telegraph (I wanted a comment on the EU coercions upon the Scottish Referendum - but they are also biased or told what to allow comment and what not to).
But this was a click bait on "Sex, older women love having it. Shock Horror (sic)" - oh I missed out 4 exclamation marks!!!!
If some want to use talking about sex as an attention grab, I can use the occasion to share something that you are of course entirely free to disregard and which makes no claim on your attention beyond you ongoing willingness.
Showing posts with label sexual love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sexual love. Show all posts
Sunday, 16 February 2014
Wednesday, 24 April 2013
Is science inherently loveless?
50 Sultry Facts About Sex at livescience
Popular science-speak, is so out of touch with what it is to live life! That is - it is so loveless.
Sex is simply communication, and like other forms of communication can be a communion of loving intimacy, a tacit agreement to separate gratifications, a private fantasy, a weapon of coercive and manipulative intent, or a shield of distractive intent.
Human beings do not merely procreate babies with sexual intimacy, they can 'make love', - not that they make what love is - but that they can become so undefended in themselves with each other as to allow love to be the full movement and awareness of life itself.
Religious personalities often have a liability for guilt that denies and distorts the impulse to share as they are conditioned by moral belief sets that are rarely transcended.
Materialistic, scientific and separative human personalities are predisposed to a control mentality based on a disconnected and seemingly independent (but actually programmed) search for gratification - may also have guilt but buried in further layers of dissociation.
The freedom from guilt is not in the surrender to the instinctual so much as the full embrace of all that it is to be human - for to be less that what we are never feels whole and to give short change or use another for our private satisfaction never feels honest. Hence feeling, or love itself, is often suppressed in order to have a 'successful sex life'.
I am simply adding dimension into the subject that are somewhat missing from a popular science magazine. Truths may be socially or culturally accepted - but that doesn't make them true, and the most reductionist truths have the least meaning.
Sex is the interplay of apparently polarized qualities and energies whereby the whole of creation is expressed. The analysis of dismembered parts cannot account for that You Are and that you are Aware that existence Is.
Wednesday, 19 September 2012
Why sex is not what we think
An article on why sex evolved? doesn't mean a lot to me because I don't see evolution as the god it is worshipped to be by a mentality that hasn't truly observed and owned its own foundation.
I wrote two comments below:
~ ~ ~
Comment 1:
There is a two way aspect to all things in this world.
Looked at with the lens of separation, sex is all the things that a mechanical survival based view, measures and observes it as being; a transaction or communication dictated by 'prevail and survive'. The very nature of the survival urge is of response to threat and the very nature of the urge to prevail sets up the action by which opposing reaction gives rise to a sense of threat. The whole business is covered over with a self-protective fantasy in which the forms of Life are used to enact fantasy upon. Such is not only pertaining to sex - but the world! Living in our story rather than observing and responding to actuality as an integral participant.
Looked at with the implicit awareness of a pure participance, sexual love is one integral aspect of a reflection of a merging or Unified essence. An undefendedness of being to its own Source and Nature. To love God perfectly (holding nothing back as one's own 'take') IS to love your brother as your self. (Brother here is not a sexual term but an indicator of a common Source and Nature).
The commandments made famous by Jesus are not something one can 'do' but are something one can let into and realize to be true - by releasing all the self-regarding 'doings' that obstruct the natural flow of our being.
The inter-penetrating nature and communication that is also 'sex' is not a special state of breaking siege in order to go out and get something; but is the Way everything already be's.
The lens of separation or 'thinking' uses Life to get something - and that it how it gets to feel deprived. Repeated getting hollows out and depletes the relationship of any residual Blessing. The forms of sex are ritually enacted in order to get things from relationship and often by mutual agreement have no real intent to actually relate directly at all.
Sex is thus one of the simplest ways of experiencing shared being - and 'making' love is not so much making it as making love welcome and tangible.
Sex is thus one of the most guilt ridden and convoluted complexities of the human mind.
Another angle is simply to say that everything is only what you bring of yourself to it. The purpose that we hold in our heart and mind determines everything of our experience - starting with the very sense of self from which all else proceeds.
Thankyou for your attention
Comment 2:
Love's delight is in infinite variety of unique expression.
This extends in a world of form as a playful exploration of forms - but is also the capacity of love to be ever new. Heraclitus never made love to the same woman twice - for she is not as she was before and nor is he. This is the Secret within form that chasing after and identifying with form has forgotten.
Back to organic perspectives:
That there is a communication between apparently conflicting interests at a deeper level is itself enough to suggest Tweedledee and Tweedledum - who SEEMS to effect a polarity of conflicting forces or interests but dissolve before the awareness of the Big Black Crow.
Not a very nice word for God - but there's no way that the mind in addiction to conflict is going to recognize or welcome love.
But the capacity of the mind to put truth (now!) on hold while pursuing an idea is not to be underestimated. Nor is it in itself sinful. But a wilfulness to lock reality (now!) out so as to prevail in one's own thought will bring with it all the baggage of sin, (dissonance or 'wrongness' of being), sickness and struggle and isolation and loss.
Because the mind can make itself sort of temporarily comfortable within such a hell, it can protect its own suffering against its own joy. Nothing one says to it will get through. But tolerance for pain is not infinite. Mind is not FIXED or LOCKED.
Letting life in and growing trust are one step at a time willingness for letting Life Move You as one-with instead of trying to leverage it from a presumed separateness.
Thankyou for your attention
I wrote two comments below:
~ ~ ~
Comment 1:
There is a two way aspect to all things in this world.
Looked at with the lens of separation, sex is all the things that a mechanical survival based view, measures and observes it as being; a transaction or communication dictated by 'prevail and survive'. The very nature of the survival urge is of response to threat and the very nature of the urge to prevail sets up the action by which opposing reaction gives rise to a sense of threat. The whole business is covered over with a self-protective fantasy in which the forms of Life are used to enact fantasy upon. Such is not only pertaining to sex - but the world! Living in our story rather than observing and responding to actuality as an integral participant.
Looked at with the implicit awareness of a pure participance, sexual love is one integral aspect of a reflection of a merging or Unified essence. An undefendedness of being to its own Source and Nature. To love God perfectly (holding nothing back as one's own 'take') IS to love your brother as your self. (Brother here is not a sexual term but an indicator of a common Source and Nature).
The commandments made famous by Jesus are not something one can 'do' but are something one can let into and realize to be true - by releasing all the self-regarding 'doings' that obstruct the natural flow of our being.
The inter-penetrating nature and communication that is also 'sex' is not a special state of breaking siege in order to go out and get something; but is the Way everything already be's.
The lens of separation or 'thinking' uses Life to get something - and that it how it gets to feel deprived. Repeated getting hollows out and depletes the relationship of any residual Blessing. The forms of sex are ritually enacted in order to get things from relationship and often by mutual agreement have no real intent to actually relate directly at all.
Sex is thus one of the simplest ways of experiencing shared being - and 'making' love is not so much making it as making love welcome and tangible.
Sex is thus one of the most guilt ridden and convoluted complexities of the human mind.
Another angle is simply to say that everything is only what you bring of yourself to it. The purpose that we hold in our heart and mind determines everything of our experience - starting with the very sense of self from which all else proceeds.
Thankyou for your attention
Comment 2:
Love's delight is in infinite variety of unique expression.
This extends in a world of form as a playful exploration of forms - but is also the capacity of love to be ever new. Heraclitus never made love to the same woman twice - for she is not as she was before and nor is he. This is the Secret within form that chasing after and identifying with form has forgotten.
Back to organic perspectives:
That there is a communication between apparently conflicting interests at a deeper level is itself enough to suggest Tweedledee and Tweedledum - who SEEMS to effect a polarity of conflicting forces or interests but dissolve before the awareness of the Big Black Crow.
Not a very nice word for God - but there's no way that the mind in addiction to conflict is going to recognize or welcome love.
But the capacity of the mind to put truth (now!) on hold while pursuing an idea is not to be underestimated. Nor is it in itself sinful. But a wilfulness to lock reality (now!) out so as to prevail in one's own thought will bring with it all the baggage of sin, (dissonance or 'wrongness' of being), sickness and struggle and isolation and loss.
Because the mind can make itself sort of temporarily comfortable within such a hell, it can protect its own suffering against its own joy. Nothing one says to it will get through. But tolerance for pain is not infinite. Mind is not FIXED or LOCKED.
Letting life in and growing trust are one step at a time willingness for letting Life Move You as one-with instead of trying to leverage it from a presumed separateness.
Thankyou for your attention
Sunday, 6 February 2011
Monday, 20 December 2010
Lovelessness and pornography
Lovelessness - asserts it freedoms to abuse, exploit and worship fantasies upon life, upon others upon ones own body - as a substitute for real relationship - which it knows nothing of - and fears. It knows not an honouring, trust-growing, undefended, and loving relationship and lives out a distorted fantasy life in secret.
Sexual loving is a beautiful language of being. Our bodies are wonderful communicators of loving presence - as we allow ourselves to let go of strategic self interest - getting something or getting away from something - and discover ourselves caring, playing, and holding each other. Oneness is not a climax - it is the very ground of our being - shared. There is so much more to life than what we think we know - and that is experienced a wonder, beauty and a glorious quality of being - of a communioned life.
Lovelessness is a disconnected sense of self-lack in isolation that restlessly seeks stimulating distraction in order to feel alive - and thus deadens itself and calls it 'satisfaction'. It then ups the stakes in order to get a hit or becomes addicted to reenacting empty rituals. Fantasy life that fucks up the capacity to look beyond outer forms and discover the truly wondrous nature of love - because a society that has become fearful has turned its back on love and instead seeks selfishly to grasp at whatever offers makes its pain subside - and hates to open to a light of a shared awareness. It hates to love - and loves to hate.
By being available outside a cultural context of relationship, pornography becomes culturally acceptable currency. Women have their labia cut to look like the girls in the porn. College kids emulating the porn scenarios that are purveyed as if women are dirty slut bitches and fit only to fist, fuck and cum all over as if that were a gift!
When does playing in - and exploring boundaries become the deception and abduction or coercion of sex slaves? Is it when we care more about maintaining our own fantasies than letting the truth of another - or of our self - interfere?
I am writing here because there is a much larger conversation about our sexuality, than socially induced consumerism, that extends a 'culture' of exploitation, manipulation, and usury - and calls it freedom. It is not talked openly - but referred to in comic tones - that let a sort of slapstick, gloss over and sanitize it as a 'bit o'fun'.
Now if a demeaning and malicious lie about you is propagated as if it were truth - you would not subscribe to it - nor would you nurture it - nor would you defend its right to be equal to the truth. Instead you would subscribe to that which promotes appreciation of truth, and invest your care and value in it. You might struggle long to come to your senses though as the cultural pressures suggest that its ok to fuck yourself up - or indeed anyone else - because we are free of outdated and phoney moral sensibilities - and "We are all individuals".
Distractions that serve to cover the dissonance of human life do not really give freedom - they bring hollow emptiness and addiction. However, with those whose full intent is to wilfully assert themselves as they are not - and declare themselves self-content - it is vain to argue. Life is a teaching - learning adventure - and we are free to learn through pain as well as joy. Forgiveness is a real release from guilt when one is willing to accept and share it. No one is damned but by their own refusal.
What we demonstrate in our lives - is the culture that we share - particularly to those who we welcome into the world and pass on the ways we know. All are free to learn according to their own heart's guidance - no matter what experiences we have - we ultimately choose the meaning it has for us.
But the Meaning that is uncovered that truly serves us all is not one of dressing up in the dark so as to play out our own psychodrama - but of a genuine kindness, care and attention.
I see the raising of the curtains of a false privacy as the disclosure to ourselves of ourselves - and this IS a real opportunity. Because amidst our self spun script of a life we act out as if it were real - and discover perhaps a lot later - that we chose against our own heart's desire.
There may be a lot of money in selling porn - but there is only an undermining of commonwealth. Is there a place for it? Of course there is - but if it is not kept in its place it usurps ... the capacity of Soul to feel and know life directly.
Thanks for your attention
Sexual loving is a beautiful language of being. Our bodies are wonderful communicators of loving presence - as we allow ourselves to let go of strategic self interest - getting something or getting away from something - and discover ourselves caring, playing, and holding each other. Oneness is not a climax - it is the very ground of our being - shared. There is so much more to life than what we think we know - and that is experienced a wonder, beauty and a glorious quality of being - of a communioned life.
Lovelessness is a disconnected sense of self-lack in isolation that restlessly seeks stimulating distraction in order to feel alive - and thus deadens itself and calls it 'satisfaction'. It then ups the stakes in order to get a hit or becomes addicted to reenacting empty rituals. Fantasy life that fucks up the capacity to look beyond outer forms and discover the truly wondrous nature of love - because a society that has become fearful has turned its back on love and instead seeks selfishly to grasp at whatever offers makes its pain subside - and hates to open to a light of a shared awareness. It hates to love - and loves to hate.
By being available outside a cultural context of relationship, pornography becomes culturally acceptable currency. Women have their labia cut to look like the girls in the porn. College kids emulating the porn scenarios that are purveyed as if women are dirty slut bitches and fit only to fist, fuck and cum all over as if that were a gift!
When does playing in - and exploring boundaries become the deception and abduction or coercion of sex slaves? Is it when we care more about maintaining our own fantasies than letting the truth of another - or of our self - interfere?
I am writing here because there is a much larger conversation about our sexuality, than socially induced consumerism, that extends a 'culture' of exploitation, manipulation, and usury - and calls it freedom. It is not talked openly - but referred to in comic tones - that let a sort of slapstick, gloss over and sanitize it as a 'bit o'fun'.
Now if a demeaning and malicious lie about you is propagated as if it were truth - you would not subscribe to it - nor would you nurture it - nor would you defend its right to be equal to the truth. Instead you would subscribe to that which promotes appreciation of truth, and invest your care and value in it. You might struggle long to come to your senses though as the cultural pressures suggest that its ok to fuck yourself up - or indeed anyone else - because we are free of outdated and phoney moral sensibilities - and "We are all individuals".
Distractions that serve to cover the dissonance of human life do not really give freedom - they bring hollow emptiness and addiction. However, with those whose full intent is to wilfully assert themselves as they are not - and declare themselves self-content - it is vain to argue. Life is a teaching - learning adventure - and we are free to learn through pain as well as joy. Forgiveness is a real release from guilt when one is willing to accept and share it. No one is damned but by their own refusal.
What we demonstrate in our lives - is the culture that we share - particularly to those who we welcome into the world and pass on the ways we know. All are free to learn according to their own heart's guidance - no matter what experiences we have - we ultimately choose the meaning it has for us.
But the Meaning that is uncovered that truly serves us all is not one of dressing up in the dark so as to play out our own psychodrama - but of a genuine kindness, care and attention.
I see the raising of the curtains of a false privacy as the disclosure to ourselves of ourselves - and this IS a real opportunity. Because amidst our self spun script of a life we act out as if it were real - and discover perhaps a lot later - that we chose against our own heart's desire.
There may be a lot of money in selling porn - but there is only an undermining of commonwealth. Is there a place for it? Of course there is - but if it is not kept in its place it usurps ... the capacity of Soul to feel and know life directly.
Thanks for your attention
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Sex without relationship is a bit like asset stripping. It seems alluring but hollows out the forms that could communicate life and love.
The real taboo in our society is intimacy whether sexual or on any other level.
Lack of intimacy is a disconnected, alienated sense of a self that leads to a search for substitutes of stimulation - as well as fantasy role play.
We long for a truly intimate sense of being - and yet look for it as if it could be 'added to our self' rather than opened up within our relationships with each other.
It isn't that I care to demonise the creative discovery of sexual communication - whose scope far exceeds the narrow approach of either stress release or fantasy.
But loveless habits of intention and attention, grown in the mind and enacted in the body can become deeply obstructive to the true sharing of defenceless trust in an innocence of being that delights in sharing and being the very life that moves us.
The internet - in part - is revealing the so called 'private mind'. The great thing about becoming aware of our mind, is that we can wake up to that we indulge self destructive thought - and uncover a willingness to let it go.
I'm not on a moral crusade here. I am saying that there is so much more to life than anything that the market seeks to induce you to consume and that market driven society has a vested interest in shaping your thought so that you can believe you a free independent person searching for and gaining happiness in a world that is here to fulfil your private gratifications.
The internet can offer an extra level of virtual reality to that already being acted out in a fantasy life. New ways to be distracted and new ways to access things in a couple of clicks that indulge an often otherwise forbidden experience - in fantasy.
Well I've little doubt that many folk meet up and take it another step and maybe they find someone who really cares for them - and maybe they don't care for anyone else excepting to get a hit off them. A lot of what comes to us in life is found because we are open to finding it.
If you get sick of yourself or your life - you might become open to listening deeper than the thinking that gets you sick. Real nakedness is a defenceless loving welcome. To give and to receive true welcome is NOT coercive, manipulative nor strategically motivated - it is loving. It's straight and its in the light of honesty.
The internet can also be used to communicate - like this. I really enjoy seeing happy people - rather than fearful, downcast or joyless people. So you are right - I have a vested interest here. Joy is your heart's freedom song. You're worth it - because they are. Thanks for your attention.